if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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