Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Randomize
