remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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