yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
