Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Randomize