my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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