does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize