She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
