Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Randomize