Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
It was confusing and full of hummus
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize