She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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