I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
