Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
