i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
