she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
