your room smells of hookers.
And success
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
