covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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