"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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