One girl and one boy is just not enough.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Randomize
