i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
