I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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