I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize