Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
