Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
