where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
