Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
