All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
