I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
