Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
