How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
