Small penises have feelings too.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
