Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
