dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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