I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize