This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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