You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
