At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
