Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
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