I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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