At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Randomize
