you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
It's rum buckets o'clock
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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