This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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