is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
