Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Why did my mother make you get naked?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
