I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
