it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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