where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
