Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
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