Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
