I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
