Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize